***It’s two in the morning and I’m wide awake. The night-silence
is the perfect backdrop for what I’m doing—no distractions can invade my thoughts.
My fingers skim across the keys, barely touching, as I zealously try to get the
words out of my head and onto the screen.***
That was typical a few years ago, but I’ve had to dedicate
my nights back to sleep. Without sleep, my morning persona is even uglier than
normal (I’m NOT a morning person). And, it’s kind of embarrassing when my son
has caught me going back to sleep after the alarm on a couple of occasions.
So…I’ve had to work on balancing my writing with the most
vital thing in my life—family. I’m not earning any money, so technically it’s
just an obsessive hobby I have. Being a stay-at-home parent doesn’t warrant any
monetary imbursement either, but one day I have to release these tiny people
into the world. I’d feel a lot better knowing that we’ve done our best at
molding good, moral people.
Since my home and my kids are my real job, I have to get out of the house to get any decent writing
done. Otherwise I multitask. I mean, there’s really no excuse why I can’t do
laundry and write at the same time. And, when a 140 pound dog starts asking for
a walk, I’m pretty inclined to give it to him. Needless to say, my best writing
happens without distractions.
So I make time.
I “clock-in” three times a week at a local Starbucks. I see the
same faces frequently, so I refer to them as my coworkers. I grab a tea, or
some sugared up latte-ish beverage, put in my earbuds, and write for as many
hours as the day will allow (usually five).
But I wasn’t always so dedicated. When I became a mom, I
thought I had to give up parts of me. I stopped reading, writing, and painting
on any sort of regular basis. I was satisfied being just a mom for many years,
but I always did have a feeling that I was meant to be more.
When they were little and I started writing more frequently,
it was for a purpose. My daughter wanted to grow up and be just like me—so she
picked up a broom. To me, it was devastating. I am so much more than a
housewife. It became important to me in that moment that my kids know who I
really am—what I gave up to raise them. So I started to write more often, and I
picked up my paintbrush again.
Now, they still want to mop or help clean the house (on
occasion), but I also catch them writing little stories of their own with
elaborate pictures to go with them.
In my own tribulations, I’ve learned that you don’t have to
give up anything to start something new; you just have to find a balance. I’ll
be honest, it’s something I struggle with every day. If I start a book, it’s
really hard for me to put it down. I could sit at the computer and write my
stories all day. If I’m painting a pet portrait, I sit for seven hours straight…forget
dinner.
I know that if I find success as a writer, and it becomes an
official job, the balance will have to change again. I’ve read the blogs of
many famous writers, and I take note of the traveling they do. Many of them
will take a solo trip somewhere just so they have peace and quiet to write.
I will probably always struggle with balancing everything in
my life—partly because I think I can do it all.
Can’t I?
